Saturday again and I refuse to stay on the pity pot!  Where has my motivation gone?  My zest?  Talking to God on the way home from work yesterday. I was asking,  "What is going on here.   What am I not getting?  Show me what I need to learn from all this...show me, show me! "   My critical Controller tells me to suck it up.  She tells me I'm not the first person in the world to sustain a trimalleolar fracture, that I should be able to do much more than I'm doing.  She perpetuates fear and unease.  Unease with myself and others.  That stupid worrying what others think again.

God is in control and I choose to let Him be.  I will affirm His words over my life.  Let His strength be mine in weakness.  Allow...  Allow Him to be the love and security and grace and growth in my life.  Open, available...

I took the first step...called Beckie.  Now we, with Mother, are having lunch at Jocko's and going to their house afterwards.   I showered, washed my hair reveling  in the thought of being with my family instead of sitting home alone  feeling sorry for myself.  I took the adult step, God gave me the strength and I'm reaping the pleasant vibes.